Sex isn’t supposed to hurt -- but sometimes it does. Well over
half of all women will, at some point in their lives (most
especially after menopause), experience vaginal dryness severe
enough to interfere with lovemaking. "Nothing shuts down sexual
feelings faster than pain," says Harry Fisch, MD, clinical
professor of urology and reproductive medicine, Weill Cornell
Medical College/New York Presbyterian Hospital, and a regular guest
on The Dr. Oz Show. He added that the cause of most
pain during sex is vaginal dryness.
WHAT’S UP DOWN THERE?
When I talked with Dr. Fisch, he explained that there are two
ways women can solve the problem of vaginal dryness. Using a
lubricant is obviously easiest and we’ll go into that in a moment.
However, it’s important to first realize that there are several
possible underlying reasons your body might not produce adequate
lubrication. Potential causes include...
- Normal hormonal
changes. Even premenopausal women can experience
dryness during parts of their menstrual cycle, during pregnancy and
while nursing.
- Menopause. The
decline in estrogen production during menopause can leave women
feeling as if someone has suddenly, and literally, shut off the
"fountain" of youth.
-
Medications. Some drugs cause dryness,
everywhere -- for example, antihistamines don’t just keep your nose
from running! Medications for anxiety or depression also can result
in a lack of lubrication.
- Personal-care
products. Bubble bath, scented soaps and lotions and
douching can disrupt the natural chemistry of the vagina.
-
"Baggage." Life stress and unresolved issues
between you and your partner also can turn off the juice at the
wrong moments.
Some of these issues can be more easily solved than others --
some on your own, and some with your doctor’s input.
LUBRICATING SOLUTIONS
Because it is so easy and effective, however, most women have
great success by simply using some sort of lubricant. Dr. Fisch
said that many women find natural solutions work beautifully -- he
says botanical oils such as coconut, canola, olive, grape seed and
aloe vera can all serve the purpose quite nicely. Also helpful is
squalane, a natural oil usually made from shark liver, but which
can be formulated from plant seeds. It is used as a base in many
high-end skin products and is available online at
Amazon.com,
iHerb.com or at health-food
stores.
Note: It’s important to be aware that
these oils may adversely affect the latex in condoms and
diaphragms and/or can cause allergic reactions in some
people.
You can buy a wide variety of over-the-counter lubricating
gels that are not only inexpensive, but in some cases can even
enhance the sexual experience -- for instance, by adding warmth. If
you decide to try one of these, Dr. Fisch advises reading the label
carefully before buying. Whether sold at the local supermarket, a
drugstore or an adult emporium, be aware that...
- Some lubricants contain hormones
that many women don’t want.
- Petroleum-based (and oil-based)
lubricants can cause latex condoms or diaphragms to deteriorate and
fail. They also may promote yeast infections.
- Some contain topical anesthetics --
so much for pleasure, huh?
- You may find the way they smell,
feel or taste to be a turnoff.
Because of these concerns, Dr. Fisch has developed products
including a lubricating gel called Sexual Health Formula
Lubricating Warming Gel (
www.SexualHealthGel.com). It uses
natural ingredients that improve blood flow. He recommends
massaging a drop onto the clitoris -- you can reapply it as
needed.
Price: $59.99 for a one-ounce bottle.
Of course, less expensive and more basic lubricants such as KY
jelly are still an option -- and the usual advice to take care of
yourself (eat healthfully... don’t smoke -- it lowers estrogen
levels... don’t overindulge in alcohol, which dehydrates you... and
drink plenty of water) will help to lubricate you from within. But
don’t be afraid to try something new -- many couples find that
using lubricants enhances their experience in ways that they didn’t
expect.