Sure, it seemed like after the years of hard
drinking, petty crime, and run-ins with the law,
Elmo had cleaned up his act
-- but a shocking report out of Tampa Bay, Florida, says otherwise.
A two-year-old's life has been turned upside down by vicious talk
coming from his favorite toy, Elmo Knows Your Name. It seems that
after a recent battery change, the PC-interfacing doll began
spouting death threats of "kill James" at the toddler, with
seemingly no explanation as to how the new phrase entered his
vocabulary. The situation came to a head when the boy's mother
heard her son repeating the twisted suggestion. Of course, what she
didn't hear was Elmo's other threat: that he would "cut anyone who
crossed [him] end-to-end with a Bowie knife," and, "dine on their
internal organs." Fisher Price says it has a team of experts
working on the case, and enough tranquilizer darts to put Elmo
down, "For good."